Obviously For Some…Just Not Hard Enough

Two weeks before Valentine’s Day…though I am not really all too excited. I am viewing it as just another day. Well, I guess that’s because I am single. How cliche, you might think, but I swear I’ve got my reasons. Last year I had a boyfriend and was living in a foreign city.

I’m not having much luck in New York so I think that if dating in New York fails that perhaps next year I will try being single while living abroad. Eh, screw it, I have truly found that men are the same around the world; only the scenery changes. Bright sunshine, warm weather, and tan skin just seem to make a bad situation more bearable.

Last year, I had a bit of affection and not much sex…ok, I can’t lie…no sex. I could count on one hand how many times I was laid over a five month period. Strangely enough, this V-day, though I am not expecting flowers, dinner, or seeing a film…though I am looking forward to a crazy evening of lustful bliss. Say what you may, but fuck buddies are in.

I met Adam a few years ago and he was my first and only Internet dating experience. We went out for drinks one evening and decided there was definitely an attraction, though we were totally incompatible for anything other than a sexual relationship. Quite simply we had great sex and have kept it that way for the past few years and what a great way to see the city from so many different boardrooms, rooftops, boiler rooms…You get the picture?

Plus, if I continue calling on Adam when I am not involved exclusively with anyone, I don’t worry about sleeping around. My principles aren’t compromised and I am completely satisfied. What a wonderful world! When involved in a relationship, I am quite a loyal girlfriend. Though when single in this city, it can’t hurt to call in the reserves, when necessary.

I am still reflecting on Adam’s and my latest “date” when I walk into my apartment, which I share with Ruby, who is in the bathtub buried beneath a mountain of bubbles and on her way to the finish line at the bottom of yet another Ben and Jerry’s pint.

The poor girl is considering breaking up with a boy…er…man…whom I have blessed with the moniker–Limpdick. Poor Ruby…I would love to tell her about my latest “date” at The Lincoln Building…the beautiful view from his office on the 52nd floor is enough to get me hot and bothered…and…mmm…I must say…the man is talented …WAIT! FOCUS!

“Ruby”, I say, “ice cream and the hot bubble bath are great…though we both know his soft serve is not your flavor”, as I scoop another mouthful of Chunky Monkey from the pint, “no matter the topping, he will never satisfy you”.-Frankie